I don't read music. I could never make a living singing but I love to sing and I've been in choirs since I was old enough to join them. Just for the record, I'm awesome in the shower and when alone in the car! I met my husband because of singing. Although I become a huge bundle of nerves if asked to sing a solo, I like to think that my voice blends well with a group and that's where I'm most comfortable.
There's also something about "choir people" that I love. They are family.
I lost my voice a few months ago following a surgery that traumatized my vocal cords. My speaking voice wasn't normal for seven weeks, it took another month for my singing voice to return and that scared me. My view of worship is entirely different when viewing it from the congregation as opposed to the choir. I was probably supposed to use that time as a learning interlude: learning to listen, learning to partake in the mass without singing, learning to pray without singing. Instead, I was worried.
Today I sang in church the for the second time since August. My first attempt was okay but this time I felt strong. After communion we sang an acapella piece. The church was silent; the song was both haunting and uplifting as a group of voices soared together in thanksgiving for all that we are given. The sum of those individual voices joining and blending without accompaniment was a moment worth savoring. I'm not worried anymore. I'm back with my choir family.